to be able to eat candybars and spit out diabetes

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The power to become a laptop forever!

thumb_up thumb_down +115

the power to convert oxygen and glucose to water and carbon dioxide every time you breathe.

thumb_up thumb_down +111

i love to make shit brix

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The power to not being able to go use the bathroom when you have to

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The Power To Be Sent Back To Your Exam's And Then Getting All The Answers Wrong Making Your Intermittent Future A Dream And Your Mansion A Tent.

thumb_up thumb_down +109

The power to be french.

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The ability to get anyone answer your messages when the answer starts: What the...

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The ability to read people's thoughts but only in a language that you do not understand.

thumb_up thumb_down +105

The power to defeat Chuck Norris but only if you can reach the speed of light

thumb_up thumb_down +105

The power to be invisible but when no one is looking

thumb_up thumb_down +105

The ability to like this post

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the power of the succulent game

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The power to smell people's moods

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The power to turn your navel upside down

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The power to ramble on and on endlessly with no end in sight with the most inane of thoughts that no one can begin to guess when they will end or what the value or goal of anything so long-winded might be until you find yourself questioning your very desire to go living if you are only going to continue rambling.

thumb_up thumb_down +101

The power to survive jumping form a plane as long as you have a parachute.

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The power to say things twice. The power to say things twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +97

The power to be immortal until the moment that you would die.

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The power to enhance your enemy's strength

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The ability to walk backwards... backwards.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

the ability to make a really long post ajsfffffhkshgdddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddfgggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggjssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssa

thumb_up thumb_down +85

The ability to metamorphose into any kind of cheese

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The power to be so fast, that if you sprint forward you travel the whole world just in time to fuck yourself.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!