the power to stop sitting on the internet wacthing cat videos

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The power to ramble on and on endlessly with no end in sight with the most inane of thoughts that no one can begin to guess when they will end or what the value or goal of anything so long-winded might be until you find yourself questioning your very desire to go living if you are only going to continue rambling.

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The power to destroy any electronic device seconds after touching itoesajfaokpnhgåpesajfjåaeafjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrroooooooooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

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The ability to know when men have erections

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The power to turn invisible when crossing the road.

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The power to say things twice. The power to say things twice.

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The ability to sling web like Spiderman except you can only shoot webs from your butt hole.

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The ability to have superman's powers and weaknesses, but have an 100% chance to have a suit made of indestructible kryptonite.

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The power to turn your current clothes inivisible

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The power to open jam jar lids, however stuck they are.

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The power of having a bulletproof appendix.

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the power to read when you're not looking at any word or symbol

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The power to shoot projectiles from your eyes to the inside of your head.

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The power to be immortal until the moment that you would die.

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The ability to turn anything into a belt.

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The power to teleport to the south pole.

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The power of women's rights.

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Power to give birth through your penis.

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Having perfect 20-20 vision, only when wearing glasses.

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The power to make your left hand glow whenever you put your right hand up your ass.

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The ability to be telepathic but only while sleeping. So you just think it's a dream.

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The power to date women if they say 'Yes' when you ask if they want to date.

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The power to fuck your moms pussy at will (her opinion or desire means nothing to the will of your useless superpower!). Moral: SONS OF SICKMAN FRAUD REJOICE!

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The power think five times slower.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!