Superhuman strength at the expense of being completely paralyzed

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The power to turn grow a vagina that can whistle on your neck during a full moon.

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The power to change locations with: Michael Jackson, Elvis, Hitler, Stalin, and many more, simply by jumping up and down 3 times.

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The power to run at 0.5mph

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The power to have everything taste like rubbing alcohol

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Being able to fly in place.

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the power to make an earthquake that an ant can not even feel

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The power to find this website and submit a pointless superpower.

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you can summon raccoons, but all they do is piss on your shit

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The power to handle the truth. Moral: Because with the exception of a few good men... YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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The power to fold paper seven times

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lol

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The power to know what someone thought, after they told you.

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The power of x-ray vision but unfortunatly your blind

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The power to spit so hard and fast that you hit yourself in the back of the head every time... and it can only be used once, because its so hard it goes trough everything...(thus hits you in the skull duh) including your skull... Moral: Remember kids! Protect, Serve and Survive, and ask your mommy and daddy why they make the sexytime... their response may be pretty interesting...

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the power to break the nib of a pencil so that its pointless

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the power to get somewere at the same time that you arrive.

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The amazing ability to shoot any liquid substance out of your eyes, with a requirement being you must douse your eyes with the substance beforehand.

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the ability bend your legs in a perfect circle

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The ability to look at someone and die.

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The power to turn any object into food

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the power to shoot fireballs.....only when your under water

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The power to not do it.

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The power to remove all flavour from food.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!