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The pointless superpower to miss moral man. He was a dick.

The power to be MAGNETO! And have the power to WELCOME TO DIE! You dare not WELCOME TO DIE? AHAHAH! X-CHICKEN!

Superhuman strength and endurance but only when sleeping

The power to transform any food into shit simply by eating it.

The power to imagine boobs whenever you want at any time

The power to lick any telephone pole to call somebody in the winter.

The power to lift animate objects in the same direction.

The power to become invisible, but it only works when you are using it for noble and moral purposes.

The power to jump over mountains but die when you hit the ground.

The power to run really fast, but only when facing brick walls 2 ft away.

The power to have two eyes that can't see very far or through anything.

the power to be blind, but only if you're blind

The ability to avoid work when connected to the internet. Thanks, by the way.

The power to not have a brain!

The ability to fly away, but there is a 99.99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999% chance that you will get hit by a plane while taking off.

The ability to stop only ONE bullet and ONE bullet only

The power to talk in Wingdings.

The power to turn toast back into bread

To be able to run the speed of light but only works if your standing still?.

The power to run Crysis.

the power to read this sentence

The power to iron your clothes with your mind before putting it in the washing machine

The power to fly, but only when you are less than a foot off the ground.

Pointless Super Powers