The power to teleport stupid people away from you - but they teleport to YOUR HOUSE.

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The power to buy the newest iPhone without the charger...

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The ability to have 99 problems without one of them being a female

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The power to assassinate already-dead leaders

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The power to know what someone thought, after they told you.

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have the power of making chicken appear when your a vegan

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The power of omniscience but it causes a near fatal heart attack every time you think.

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The power to think up the best lines but forget them when you try to speak

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The power to be able to taste shit from miles away.

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The power to turn into a pineapple that can teleport into a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died because of a pine apple that was in a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died.

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The power to journey into the future of the past.

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the power to get sick

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the power to turn into a tree

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The power to shape-shift only into a human

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The ability to telekinetically form crop circles in your own pubic hair.

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The power to have a invisible boat mobile

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boo

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The power to fly, but only when you touch the ground.

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the power to travel through in time, but only you when you are sleeping.

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The Power to Breath When Ur dead

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the power to kill your self when you are not under any stress

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The power to ride a camel when slapping a donkeys butt cheeks

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The power of being able to punch everything so hard that it explodes.........BUT you are not resistant to the explosions.

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The power to make the opposite of what you want to happen (and you can not think of bad things happening)

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!