The power to have everything taste like rubbing alcohol

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The power to understand irony.

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The ability to police irony

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The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

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The ability to lift small objects with your mind, but only if you are touching them.

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The power to be Omnipotent and create a rock too heavy for yourself to lift.

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The power to think of witty comebacks 3 days too late

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Acid tears.

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The power to make it impossible to have powers

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The ability to pull Bleach Flavored lighter fluid out of your ass every time you see a modern feminist or a Jacob Satorious video

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The power of temporary invincibility but you have to kill yourself first

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The ability to read. No wait that is actually helpful. Never mind.

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The ability to type with your penis on your smart phone during a video chat.

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The power to read minds but only when you're alone

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The power to regenerate, but only small cuts

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The Power to enjoy Justin Beiber's music....

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The power to be caught sniffing your sisters panties and get punished by having her crotch forced up and down yours while your mother licks your balls.

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the power to half transform to something.

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The power to instantly make an accurate assessment on tomorrow's hangover probability well before you've consumed far more than the amount of alcohol which would guarantee it...and yet manage to forget sometimes you have this superpower.

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The power to be really offensive after you finished a sentence U FUKING JAP

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the power to walk thorugh a door if its lcosed

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The power to die and come back to life in the middle of a crossfire between two tanks.

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The ability to generate bellybutton lint at will.

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The ability to teleport 1 Planck length in any direction you want

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!