the power to get sick

The power of super farts, which doesn't work unless you probably breathe, by super farts I also mean really really really stinky long farts..

The power to write about pointless superpowers.

The power to make sense of Donald Trump

the power to be in AA.

The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

Strength to instantly kill anyone just by lightly tapping them, as long as they're physically stronger than you.

The ability to pee while standing up for men

The power to state the obvious at will.

the power to melt your bones

The power to be superman on a planet without a sun

The power to sing like Justin Beiber.

The ability to see into the present.

The power to die and not come back to life.

The power to have razor sharp facial hair.

The power to sense the emotions of inanimate objects.

The ability to eat fruit cake without gagging.

the power to be Justin bieber

Each time to show up on daily live TV each time you are masturbating.

TREE POWERS ACTIVATE

the power to feel pain whenever you breathe

The power to create peanut butter and jelly sandwiches without having any peanut butter.

The power to sing Friday by Rebecca Black perfectly when it's thursday.

The power to create another human

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!