Be virtually indestructible, but only to things your not paying attention too.

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The power to be caught sniffing your sisters panties and get punished by having her crotch forced up and down yours while your mother licks your balls.

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the power to make a fart that kills people when no one is around you

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The power to instantly make an accurate assessment on tomorrow's hangover probability well before you've consumed far more than the amount of alcohol which would guarantee it...and yet manage to forget sometimes you have this superpower.

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The power to level up on a game which you can't level up on.

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the power to spit long distances at inconvenient times

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The power to urinate in mouth.

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The power to see through things but you can't turn it off once turned on.

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the power to know when the pope is taking a dump

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The power to become a virgin but only if you've never had sex.

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The power to be able to turn invisible in the dark.

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shit and piss at the same time

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The power to use your penis as a lasso.

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PATTIES THAT ARE SUPPOSEDLY READY TO EAT, BUT COVERED IN STICKY HARDENED FAT! Moral: Damn greasy hand surprise! I was going all victoly on guilty gear XXX

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The power to make whatever it is you see and/or think about into cotton candy.

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the power to stand straight but only when you bend over

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The power to blame Indonesian children for your misfortunes.

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The power to have a %90 chance of dying every single second.

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The power to eat food, unless you're touching food.

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The power to be normal and average

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The power to turn everything you touch into shit.

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The power to run as fast as a snail.

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The power to teleport all gold to criminals and or teleport criminals to gold

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The power to reverse age all the way into your fathers balls. Nero: Know my name and fear it.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!