The power to not get shit dick

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The power to die whenever you eat any type of food

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the power to make food shrimp.

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The power to release the bogus

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The power to turn delicious and tasteful food into useless brown mush.

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The ability to read Captch codes perfectly but not being able to type them correctly

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to zap people but only yourself

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The power to do unto others as you do unto yourself

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you do not need to eat but you have to sit

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the power to get somewere at the same time that you arrive.

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the power to poo out of your eyeballs and they burn when you do it

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The ability to see through other peoples eyes but only when they're closed.

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The power to pick your nose but you happen to be Lord Voldermot

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the power to do a backflip but only if you break your neck in the process

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the power to walk thorugh a door if its lcosed

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The power to turn vaseline into mercury whenever you think about throwing away a perfectly good taco

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the power to pre-tend your a animal ...

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The ability to make any amount of money appear in your wallet. The money is in the form of the Neptunarian Dollar, which has no value anywhere on Earth.

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The ability to just 1 meter high, but whenever you do so you lose a meter from your height, only to regain it when you hit the ground.

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The power of being able to punch everything so hard that it explodes.........BUT you are not resistant to the explosions.

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The power to see who is writing these powers

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The power to burst into flames (Like the Human Torch), but immediately burn to death after doing so.

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The power to teleport randomly anywhere on the planet, once every hour

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The power to turn left while actually being right about right being left so you end up heading upways down the street and confuse the shit out of people. Moral: But will it blend?

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!