The power to barf up a narwhal, but only on Wednesdays.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

The ability to hover slightly above the ground on Wednesdays.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

The power to make a rather pointless comeback here... Moral: See what I mean? ;),

thumb_up thumb_down +67

the power to eat bread

thumb_up thumb_down +65

The power to talk without a tongue

thumb_up thumb_down +59

the power to get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down +57

The power to make every female cop want you... IN JAIL.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

The power to grow your fingernails .0001 centimeters a day

thumb_up thumb_down +55

The power to be gangsta, only in front of true gangsta's.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

The power of measuring grains of corn from a large distance.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

to have the power to dig a hole 2 milimeters deep in a century

thumb_up thumb_down +53

the power to pee for longer then a normal person

thumb_up thumb_down +51

the power to shrink 0.1 millimeter or grow 0.1 millimeter

thumb_up thumb_down +49

The ability to breath in a complete vacuum but nowhere else

thumb_up thumb_down +47

The power to win any game against a 5-year-old.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

The power to resurrect the dead but only for 1 second.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

the power to be like charlie sheen and relize that my score is 0

thumb_up thumb_down +39

The ability to turn into a phone when its smash your phone season

thumb_up thumb_down +37

The power to remember the funniest thing in the world and have a full on laughing fit, as long as you are at a funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

The power to always lie even when you don't want to and then you have to truthfully say that you were lying otherwise the closest person kicks you in the groins.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

The power to become retarded but your so stupid you forget how to turn it off

thumb_up thumb_down +31

The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

The power to shrink smaller than oxygen molecules.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

The immeasurable power to thumb this up all the way to the top... or even at all... I mean thumbing it down makes a lot more sense... then again this is pointless as hell ;D Richter : Hydro Storm! Rain: KSSSSHHH!!!! Dracula: Ugh agh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh... Ahh!! Iiiiyoouu!! Play time's over, grant me powweeeeeeerrrrrraaaaaaahhh!!! Richter: Hydro Storm! Rain: KSSSSSSSSHHHH!!!!! Fire burning Dracula: Chug chug chug chug chug! Dracula: No, this cannot be!!! AAAAAAHHHH!!! Fire burning the picture: Tugshung, gshung, gshung!gh... Moral: Now I am just screwing around, I recently played an dusty old game Called Castlevania: Symphony of the night... best game ever...

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!