The power to make cheeseburgers only when your tummy is full.

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The power to read everything 2 seconds faster than usual

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The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

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The ability to look at someone and die.

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The power to see everything that will happen in your future life when you die.

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The power to do unto others as you do unto yourself

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The ability to see through other peoples eyes but only when they're closed.

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The power to close your eyes and drift off to a state of unconsciousness.

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The power to walk on water mixed with cornstarch and cesium.

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The power to die while dieing

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The power to wake up one second earlier than everyone else.

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The power to live,but only when you are dead

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The ability to talk to deer, only while riding one.

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the power to defecate while standing up...

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the power to put paper to your nose and blow strange liqeud type substance into it.

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Justin Bieber

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The power to seduce any woman but only if you're gay

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The power of compulsive lying.

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mime-o-moid. The power to pretend to be stuck in a box, walk a dog and climb a rope.

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The power to become the best player in every Moral Kombat game there is. Test your Morals... TSHHH, test your morals TSHHH MORAL KOMBAT! Mortal: FEAR THE WRATH OF MORAL KAHN!

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The ability to know who is calling without looking at caller ID

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The ability to shoot apples, but they disintegrate in mid-air. Also, the apples are tiny.

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the power to like Liam Brudenell, That is pointless

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The power to slowly float upward with awesome evil aura whenever you laugh evilly (just like in the movies/anime/etc) Only to realize you are stuck up there until someone gets a crane or something to get you down...

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!