The power to speak Italian fluently while dining in a Chinese restaurant.

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The power to become the worlds most famous necrophilia pornstar after dying.

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being black

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The power to disintegrate yourself

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The power to know you don't have a superpower

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The ability to know what time it is when looking at a working clock.

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The power to run really fast, but only when facing brick walls 2 ft away.

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The power to be stupid

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The power to have 50%-78% water in your body

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Acid tears.

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The power to lose this power.

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the power to eat bread

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The power to be able to see words backwards, but not any faster than the average mentally handicapped person can read backwards.

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The power to read everything 2 seconds faster than usual

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The power to be really offensive after you finished a sentence U FUKING JAP

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The power to fuck your mum whenever you want

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The power to see everything that will happen in your future life when you die.

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The power to see through glass walls.

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The power to fly during 0,2 seconds.

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The power of drawing perfects dog dicks, but not dogs at all.

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A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

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The ability to know if you're the only human alive.

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The ability to recall lyrics of particularly terrible music with perfect accuracy.

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the power to defecate while standing up...

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!