- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

the ability to glow in the light.

The power to bake cakes precisely 2.7% faster than usual.

EntirelyTooManyNapkins Man

The power to shoot sperm out of your eyes

The power of learning

The ability to breathe and swallow at the same time.

hello

The power to die at will

The power to drown on land.

The power to go back in time one second at a time, but the ability takes one second to recharge.

The ability to teleport to any place in the universe, but only if it is currently occupied by something else

The power to be an idiot.

To have to ability to lose the game, even with hax.

The power to have your finger and toenail grow twice as fast as normal.

The power to be the best video game player ever but you have squeakers follow you everywhere calling you a hacker and saying there going to report you

The power to shrink your private parts.

The power to barf up a narwhal, but only on Wednesdays.

The power to fly if you are eating.

The power to speak any language except the language of your people.

the ability to self resurrect only if you are not dead

The power to teleport yourself anywhere you want except for your major organs.

The power to poop almost instantly, but you always have the runs.

The power to speak any language, but only the ones that aren't spoken in the country that you are in.

Perfect recall of every episode of Teletubies

Pointless Super Powers