The ability to look at someone and die.

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The power to be able to see words backwards, but not any faster than the average mentally handicapped person can read backwards.

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The power to be really offensive after you finished a sentence U FUKING JAP

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The power to be asleep while in bed

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The power to fuck your mum whenever you want

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The power to see everything that will happen in your future life when you die.

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The ability to see through other peoples eyes but only when they're closed.

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The power to close your eyes and drift off to a state of unconsciousness.

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The power to walk on water mixed with cornstarch and cesium.

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The power of drawing perfects dog dicks, but not dogs at all.

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The ability to know if you're the only human alive.

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The power to wake up one second earlier than everyone else.

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A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

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The power to live,but only when you are dead

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The power of making toast land butter-side up

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the power to defecate while standing up...

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The ability to talk to deer, only while riding one.

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The power to seduce any woman but only if you're gay

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Justin Bieber

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The power to become the best player in every Moral Kombat game there is. Test your Morals... TSHHH, test your morals TSHHH MORAL KOMBAT! Mortal: FEAR THE WRATH OF MORAL KAHN!

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The ability to know who is calling without looking at caller ID

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The ability to shoot apples, but they disintegrate in mid-air. Also, the apples are tiny.

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The power to slowly float upward with awesome evil aura whenever you laugh evilly (just like in the movies/anime/etc) Only to realize you are stuck up there until someone gets a crane or something to get you down...

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the power to like Liam Brudenell, That is pointless

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!