The power to wake up one second earlier than everyone else.

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The power to live,but only when you are dead

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The power of making toast land butter-side up

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the power to defecate while standing up...

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The ability to talk to deer, only while riding one.

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Justin Bieber

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The power to seduce any woman but only if you're gay

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The power to become the best player in every Moral Kombat game there is. Test your Morals... TSHHH, test your morals TSHHH MORAL KOMBAT! Mortal: FEAR THE WRATH OF MORAL KAHN!

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The ability to know who is calling without looking at caller ID

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The power to be invisible but only to blind people.

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The ability to shoot apples, but they disintegrate in mid-air. Also, the apples are tiny.

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The ability to make food disappear from a plate by putting it in your body.

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The power to slowly float upward with awesome evil aura whenever you laugh evilly (just like in the movies/anime/etc) Only to realize you are stuck up there until someone gets a crane or something to get you down...

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the power to like Liam Brudenell, That is pointless

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The ability to perpetually masturbate.

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The power to have uncontrollable amounts of earwax so when you put in earphones they get covered in earwax

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The ability to die at will, but not come back to life.

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The ability to talk to bacteria

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The ability to fly, but only while you're touching the ground.

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The ability to eat anything except for food

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the power to consume yourself and use it as food (dosn't remove pain and will cause medical condisions)

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power to have time to actually wright something funny in pointless superpowers

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The power to look at the sum, but only when it's night

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The power to give your grandma amazing orgasms.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!