the power to shoot fireballs only when your underwater

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The ability to read. No wait that is actually helpful. Never mind.

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The ability to know what time it is when looking at a working clock.

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The power to hole 1 inch putts.

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I HAVE A TINY PINGAS! (Penis) Moral: Ladyfriend here daring me to post this here, PFF! Is that even a dare? I got balls of steel! Oh, and I should totally ask my doctor if she can give me something that helps me unwind after multiple female company, or at least they are daring me all to type that pff! Im not even good looking... And noooooo, nobody dared me to type that, they want todeeeeeeeeeellllllllteeeeeeeeee tht BUTI SHALLOOOWWWWWWINSSSSSSSS

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The power to be stupid

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The ability to get shot, for real.

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The power to say things twice. The power to say things twice.

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The power to have 50%-78% water in your body

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Acid tears.

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The power to lose this power.

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the power to eat bread

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The ability to look at someone and die.

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The power to read everything 2 seconds faster than usual

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The power to be able to see words backwards, but not any faster than the average mentally handicapped person can read backwards.

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The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

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The power to be really offensive after you finished a sentence U FUKING JAP

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The power to fuck your mum whenever you want

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The power to see everything that will happen in your future life when you die.

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The power of drawing perfects dog dicks, but not dogs at all.

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The power to close your eyes and drift off to a state of unconsciousness.

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The power to walk on water mixed with cornstarch and cesium.

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The ability to know if you're the only human alive.

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A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!