- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The ability for your penis to tie itself into a knot.

X-Ray vision that only works on fat chicks.

The power to look at someone and imaginatively initiate intercourse in the most unreasonable way possible.

The power to rip open my shirt to show a s t-shirt

the power to be nonflammable unless your on fire

The ability to instantly friendzone yourself.

The power to find something that isn't in the last place you look.

The power to make water come out of your fingertips in a slow trickle, the way it looks in the shower.

the power to teleport to the center of the earth

The power to have your right hand permanently glued to your face.

The power to think of pointless powers.

The ability to heal someone by trying to beat them to a pulp.

The power to to excrete fluids from your body after digesting food or obtaining liquids

The ability to write a pointless superpower, which was posted earlier without having read it.

The power to have incredible wet orgasms. if you are a man.

The power to summon cops to arrest you

The power to count the number of hair on your head.... Backwards!

the power of being yourself

The power to sit on a couch whenever your mother tells you that you can.

The power to drown on land.

The power to make your self drunk using only your mind, but only while your driving your kids to school

The power to turn gourmet meals into shit.

The power to deconstruct molecules, but only when they're part of an object with a volume of 1 cubic millimeter.

The power to cum cucumbers if you are a man.

Pointless Super Powers