EntirelyTooManyNapkins Man

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The power to change TV channels once a day but only on cooking programs between 9:00AM and 9:30AM

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The power to sound like a 12 year old while playing call of duty

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The ability to hear the opinions of inanimate objects.

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The power to wave your hands without ever tiring

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The power to turn into a potato banana hybrid.

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The power to smell bacon and/or ham at 3 o clock in the afternoon on the second Saturday of March

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The power to teleport yourself into a cell of a maximum security prison made from proto-adamantium, Damascus steel & Supermanium.

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the power to eat bread

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the power to get drunk you are needed

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The power to get hard at will.

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Super strength that works for a millisecond.

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The power to eat the booty like a poor person's groceries

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The power to have a atomic fart

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Having a 5 second eidetic memory

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The power to (involuntarily) duplicate someone's wounds or illnesses by touching them.

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The power to do anything else but worship me. Moral: I DEMAND SATISFACTION! I mean I dont need it, I just want you to do something useful with your life for once... That practically makes me into a saint... Aww.... Steve Jobs No More... LOOOOOOOLLLIPOP!

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The power to shoot webs, but only out of your ass

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The ability to make slightly off colored flags of any country that can not be used in combat.

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the power to sit

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the power to write only the letter R

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The power to shatter a mirror just by staring at it.

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The power to repeat any superpower listed and getting several points until someone discovers its just a copy.

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the power to read your own mind the power of 75% levitation the power of turning into a juicy pork chop in the presence of a lion the power to believe it is butter the power to turn into a blender once and never change back the power to cry acid the power of turning highly visable while trying to sneak the power to speak, sneeze and cough really loudly and annoyingly the power to teleport half of your body the power to age extremely fast the power to have the patience to write this the power to read all of these d pwer 2 rite stupeedlee the power to thumbs down this (it also makes you look stupid) the power to only speek in sarcasm the power to see the past (not the future) emit eht lla sdrawkcab etirw ot rewop eht

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!