The power to disintegrate yourself

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The power to know you don't have a superpower

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The power to be stupid

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The power to blink at incredibly fast speeds

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Acid tears.

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the power to eat bread

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The power to be able to see words backwards, but not any faster than the average mentally handicapped person can read backwards.

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The power to be really offensive after you finished a sentence U FUKING JAP

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The power to display emotions at will

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The power to see through glass walls.

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The power to fly during 0,2 seconds.

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The ability to recall lyrics of particularly terrible music with perfect accuracy.

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A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

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The ability to know if you're the only human alive.

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the power to defecate while standing up...

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The power to live,but only when you are dead

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The power to open a walnut with your mind

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The power to think salmon.

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The power to shoot webs, but only out of your ass

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Justin Bieber

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The ability to run super fast, but you don't have legs.

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The power to fly, but only 1 millimeter above the ground, while moving at a speed slower than a snail.

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The power to become the best player in every Moral Kombat game there is. Test your Morals... TSHHH, test your morals TSHHH MORAL KOMBAT! Mortal: FEAR THE WRATH OF MORAL KAHN!

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The ability to know who is calling without looking at caller ID

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!