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Pointless Inventions
Quoted Coworkers
Scumbag Steve
Tattoo Failure
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The power to expel a slight breeze after inhaling.
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+67
The power to make really bad jokes: knock knock who's there chicken chicken who no thats an owl not a chicken, you goose!
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+67
the power to not have superpowers
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+55
The power to be the only homosexual in a house of 5 other people who are there for sex.
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+53
The ability to not be Batman
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+53
The power to kill someone as long as they've already been killed.
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+49
The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past
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+39
The ability to just 1 meter high, but whenever you do so you lose a meter from your height, only to regain it when you hit the ground.
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+35
The power drown in water
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+31
The power to control disabled people with your mind.
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+29
The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!
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+27
you have the power to se anything and everything in the entire universe, but only if you are blind.
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+25
the power to convince girls to have sex with you, but you don't have a cock
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+23
the power to have a dick in the box
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+17
The power to see 2 min. into the past.
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+13
The power to fly, but only when you touch the ground.
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+5
the power to win any video game with your feet but only when intoxicated
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-15
The ability to always wake up in time but never fall asleep in time.
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-19
The power to turn all people into giant robots which you don't control
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-21
The power to nail anyone you want (legally) but no one remembers, including you
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-57
the power to make a vagina taste like pizza
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+146
The power to yawn with your mouth closed
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+114
The power to throw-up purple cheese curds on command, but you are also allergic to purple cheese curds?
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+114
Being able to have diarrhea when every you want.
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+110
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Pointless Super Powers
A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!