The ability to walk on water, but only if you're Jesus

thumb_up thumb_down -12

The power to blink a nano second slower

thumb_up thumb_down -16

The power to have super speed for 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 milliseconds a century

thumb_up thumb_down -16

The power to phase through walls, but only when you're in an airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down +155

The ability to breath pre-chewed cereal.

thumb_up thumb_down +153

the ability to make your penis more sophistcated than yourself

thumb_up thumb_down +129

The ability to be able to be a supervillian, but only when you aren't being a villian.

thumb_up thumb_down +127

The power to easily persuade people to your opposing viewpoint

thumb_up thumb_down +121

The power to kill anything you touch, but only when touching adorable puppies.

thumb_up thumb_down +121

you can get lots of pussy, but their all severed

thumb_up thumb_down +115

The ability to fly... But when your not in the air

thumb_up thumb_down +113

Being able to create duplicates of yourself, however you must give birth to these duplicates out of your anus (incredibly painful and its highly likely that you will pass out from the pain). And to disappear they must claw their way back up.

thumb_up thumb_down +113

The power to fart glitter at birthday parties.

thumb_up thumb_down +111

To pee standing up.

thumb_up thumb_down +105

the power to create bad superpowers

thumb_up thumb_down +103

The Power to penetrate Ellen Degeneres's Vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down +95

The power to cry if you hear or see the word cry

thumb_up thumb_down +91

The power to create powers

thumb_up thumb_down +85

The power to hate/love/care about me because of who I am. Moral: Relax dear friends (you other fools relax too) I was born this way, and I love every second of it, I am on fire and this workout gives me so damn much pheromones and testosterone that I am gonna invite a cute friend and have a damn threesome! Why, because its a mans world... never forget that kids...

thumb_up thumb_down +85

The ability to steal, without getting caught, other people's pocket lint.

thumb_up thumb_down +83

To have to ability to lose the game, even with hax.

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The power to eat toxic waste as long as it is not toxic but die from non-toxic waste and stuff

thumb_up thumb_down +71

The power to complete a 100m race in exactly 100 seconds.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

The Power To Only Be Able To Move Yourself (including wheelchairs and all that) 1 meter in the entire life of the universe

thumb_up thumb_down +69

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!