The ability to walk on water, but only if you're Jesus

The power to blink a nano second slower

The power to have super speed for 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 milliseconds a century

The power to phase through walls, but only when you're in an airplane.

The ability to breath pre-chewed cereal.

the ability to make your penis more sophistcated than yourself

The ability to be able to be a supervillian, but only when you aren't being a villian.

The power to easily persuade people to your opposing viewpoint

The power to kill anything you touch, but only when touching adorable puppies.

you can get lots of pussy, but their all severed

The ability to fly... But when your not in the air

Being able to create duplicates of yourself, however you must give birth to these duplicates out of your anus (incredibly painful and its highly likely that you will pass out from the pain). And to disappear they must claw their way back up.

The power to fart glitter at birthday parties.

To pee standing up.

the power to create bad superpowers

The Power to penetrate Ellen Degeneres's Vagina.

The power to cry if you hear or see the word cry

The power to create powers

The power to hate/love/care about me because of who I am. Moral: Relax dear friends (you other fools relax too) I was born this way, and I love every second of it, I am on fire and this workout gives me so damn much pheromones and testosterone that I am gonna invite a cute friend and have a damn threesome! Why, because its a mans world... never forget that kids...

The ability to steal, without getting caught, other people's pocket lint.

To have to ability to lose the game, even with hax.

The power to eat toxic waste as long as it is not toxic but die from non-toxic waste and stuff

The power to complete a 100m race in exactly 100 seconds.

The Power To Only Be Able To Move Yourself (including wheelchairs and all that) 1 meter in the entire life of the universe

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!