the power to hear a dog whistle

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The power to be invisible but only to blind people.

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The power to get your blackberry to turn on slightly faster

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The power to make cottage cheese...With you mind!!

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the power to make the imaginary axix the best thinkers ever

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The power to be toilet paper and never run out of paper but still keep your sense of taste

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The power to make food slightly smaller.

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The power to turn left while actually being right about right being left so you end up heading upways down the street and confuse the shit out of people. Moral: But will it blend?

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the power to win any video game with your feet but only when intoxicated

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The power to fly when your touching the ground

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the ability to make toast while standing on your head at 12:46 every Tuesday Greenwich Meridian Time.

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the power to keep your fingertips wet at all times, so you can flip pages.

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The ability to grow and retract your hair at will, but cutting it will remove the ability.

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The power to phase through walls, but only when you're in an airplane.

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The ability to breath pre-chewed cereal.

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the ability to make your penis more sophistcated than yourself

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The power to laugh uncontrollably in funerals

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The power to smell a fart before someone lets it out.

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The power to easily persuade people to your opposing viewpoint

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The power to kill anything you touch, but only when touching adorable puppies.

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you can get lots of pussy, but their all severed

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Being able to create duplicates of yourself, however you must give birth to these duplicates out of your anus (incredibly painful and its highly likely that you will pass out from the pain). And to disappear they must claw their way back up.

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The power to fart glitter at birthday parties.

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The power to be extremely well-endowed while having sex, but only when masturbating

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!