- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

To grow your fingernails out and in very quickly.

The power of turning poo into Adam Sandler movies

The power to only drink when your parents are watching.

The power to throw fire out of your hands but at the same time burn your hands.

the power to tolerate all the crap superpowers

The power to let someone control your dick

The power to propel urine at the top speed of the animal you most recently thought of.

The power to have withdrawal symptoms.

The power to summon anything you hate. Moral: Relax I hate morals too, if you ever find a moral here, then its not the original guy.

The power to make only slightly funny jokes

The power to shoot sperm out of your eyes

You dont HAVE to give my former comment a thumbs ups, I mean why should I care about your opinion and needs etc? Moral: But admit to yourself that it was awesome, or else you are just lying to yourself, doing ya a favor kiddo.

The power to die whenever you eat any type of food

the power to fart the alphebet

The power to to think there are images in the clouds.

The ability to tell what a tire tastes like from 6 inches away.

Crap out everything you're allergic too

The power to make your boss s**t his pants during staff meetings

the power to put your shoes on faster than you did before

The power to move at the speed of ripeness. Moral: Ripeness is actually slightly slower than time, true fact.

The power to throw Go stones to the board so that thei form the word 'Go'

the power to have access to unlimited porn but your parents never leave the room

The power of self-propelled flight, but only when you're the President of the United States.

The power to walk on lava but you are not resistant to it

Pointless Super Powers