The superpower to speak from to anybody's asshole.

A parapalegic with super strength! Oh and with lockjaw, and addicted to Botox.

The power to move microscopic specks of dust, but only one at a time, and only a few times a year.

The power to grow your toenails, but only one at a time.

Be able to create fire with your hands but you are not invisible to it

The power to grow your nails longer

The power to recite all digits of pi, but you can’t stop and you die when you’re done

the ability to smell sounds

The power to emit contagious yawns.

The ability to breathe underwater but only when above water

The power to be arrested for crimes you did not commit

The power to see five times as clearly and up close, only when looking at insects and arachnids.

the power to shit with your mouth

The power to transport yourself back in time to when the universe began!

the power to ejaculate when a hot girl walks by

The power to achieve 98% opacity

The power to run light speed only when the world is speed up to light speed

The power to stand still for five hours

To be flaming gay. Both kinds.

The SuperPower To Have No SuperPowers

The power to go back in time and kill yourself in the past.

The power to have Chuck Norris roundhouse kick you infinity times

the power to have the remote come to you.

The power to skip the Kripp.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!