The power to make cottage cheese...With you mind!!

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The ability to open your window, and shout retarded things at your neighbors. "HEY! MY ASH SMELLS LIKE BANANAS!"

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The power to shoot 2 inches of artillery cable from your pinkie.

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To have the ability to trip over your own "meat curtains" at will and make it look graceful... somehow.

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The power to break your legs before hitting the ground after jumping off of heights

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The power to see when people fart.

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Being able to see exactly 0.001419 seconds into the future

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The power to die when touching any form of light

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The power to sing in Portuguese, but only when you're being arrested.

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The ability to dodge bullets, but only after you've been hit by the first bullet.

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The power to be born on the same day as your birthday.

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The power to turn Hydrogen Peroxide into water but only while you're using it to clean out your ears

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The power to kill anything you touch, but only when touching adorable puppies.

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The power to turn allergic to anything, but you have to eat it after.

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The power to piss only when sleeping.

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the power to make a pillow filled with feathers into a pillow filled with fluff

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The power to defuse bombs without touching them, but you have to be within 3 inches of it.

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the pouwer giv mee gramr

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The power to wiggle your toes unless they're tomatoes..

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the power to make things out of thin air that dont work.

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The power to see out of the back of your head but never the front

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The power to become the worlds most famous necrophilia pornstar after dying.

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the power to inhale and exhale air

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The power to throw away and break your wine/blood glass away before yelling HAVE AT THY! At the comment below (below this one duh, you see the other brown box? Yeah that one genius) Moral: Yeah yeah, you dont get it, but its awesome because its a MISERABLE PILE OF SECRETS!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!