The power to run in slow motion and jumping around.

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The power to turn into a lamp and stay that way till someone turns your light on.

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The power to become invincible when you're dead

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the power to fly but only during a thunder storm

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The power to write complete sentenc

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The power to buy "I cant believe its not butter" and turn the damn thing into real butter.

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The super pow.er to die at will

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the power to read something without looking at it

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The power to not be able to get powers

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The Ability to make everybody hate YOU!

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The power to not exist.

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The ability to turn invisible... when noone is looking

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the power to emit free wifi which the signal strength varies by your erection.

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The power to defuse bombs without touching them, but you have to be within 3 inches of it.

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the power to fail at everything you

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the superpower to be able to fuck extremely good with or without genitals

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The power to be super strong, but you have to be totally wasted for it to work.

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the power to be extremely guilty in the bum.

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The power to read your own mind.

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The power to summon your mom so you can prove she's not as fat as the chav in front of you is saying she is

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the ability to write using your 'inside' voice but only once your vocal cords are compromised

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The power to walk through doors, then open it.

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The power to give a **** about bigfoot

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Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!