The power to be yourself.

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the power to make your nipples taste like shit and your shit taste like nipples

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the power to vote

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The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

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A power to turn into an ant, but only one Time.

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Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

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the power to write comic books

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The power to touch the ground using only your feet

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The amazing ability to shart at your own will.

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The power to travel through time to get through school but then fail at life.

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The ability to switch your fingers with thumbs, and your thumbs with baby corn.

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The power to turn into a two by two LEGO piece - once.

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The power to give someone the power to give the power.

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The power to read minds only when people are thinking of broken pencils in a bowl full of acid.

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the power to eat gold and turn it into koosh balls

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The ability to go on cheeseburger.com whenever you want, but only when the teacher is in the room

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The ability to walk on your hands, but only when they are attached to your legs.

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The power to touch someone's face while watching rain burn.

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The power to die when you do Anything!!!

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the power to fart every time you blink

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the power to fly for 2-6 seconds only when every apple product in arizona is at 100% battery level

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The power to shrink, but only for roller coaster rides

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The power to see what's behind you.

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To point out that the superpower below was the power to type partially invisible sentences. Moral: I did not realize that most of you would find that too hard to understand, but thumb me up if you did... And thumb me up if you did not... (watches comment disappear in the minus 10000 comments section) Damn flashes of the future... Heck! Just thumb it up if you like it because you liked it... and leave it be if you do not... or else I will use my most evil superpower in the world: Ignorance... aka I will ignore it.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!