The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

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The power to snore inhumanly loud

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The power to turn into a piece of paper for five seconds

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The power to fly 2 feet in the air.

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The ability to heat up an object by 1 degree for every week you hold it.

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The power to use you`re veins as a lasso.

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The power to be allergic to bullets! :)

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The power to shoot pencils out of your mouth every 10 seconds

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The power to read while your eyes are open but you can't read while your eyes are closed.

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The power to give anyone a Kim Jong-un haircut.

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power to kill dead ppl.

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The power to turn left while actually being right about right being left so you end up heading upways down the street and confuse the shit out of people. Moral: But will it blend?

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power to turn into an idiot once you get a scholorship.

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The power to fail every time you try to do something

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The power to die when you use the letter e.

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The power to not die in lava but only when you are cold

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the power to keep your fingertips wet at all times, so you can flip pages.

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The power to fly, have heat vision, lift heavy things with ease, and invulnerability.

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to transform into a middle aged woman to fondle with your own tits(every mans dream)

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The ability to eat anything except for food

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The ability to think of a pointless ability.

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The ability to turn bread into really burnt toast while no one is watching.

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The power to breathe

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The power to ask sarah jessica parker, "why the long face?"

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!