The ability to breathe oxyen, but only when in space.

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The power to run at walk speeds.

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the power to kill every thing you see but you have to be high and drunk and naked at the same time

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the power to pee and sneeze at the same time.

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The power to watch tv while sleeping

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The power to write any thing on your chest with clear paint

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The power to perform stan up comedy whilst sitting down

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The power to get out of finger locks, only by switching fingers.

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the power to see when the lights are on

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The power to look busy at work but only when the boss is not looking.

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the ability to change the color of one eye if dehydrated nearly to the point of death

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Find Waldo

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The power to understand this: Alucard: Father! I will stand against you! Dracula: Then it is time to kill your weak human side and join me in REMAKING THIS WORLD! (battle ensues Dracula takes a hell of a beating) Dracula: AAAAAAAARGHHHHHH! Heh... sarcasm... What is a man... if he gains the world, but loses his soul... limps away... Mark 8:36 I believe... Alucard: Father! I did not wish for you to die! Dracula: Uh I lost a sole, and the world is mine, already... Alucard: Well then lets keep fighting. Moral: Richter: YOU STEAL MENS SOLES! Dracula: The same could be said about every shoe shopper... Me: You are not gonna get this one, but if Dracula STEAL MENS SOULS! Then why would he have a soul to begin with? Its confusing... and the power to understand this is meaningless... BUT ENOUGH TALK YOU MISERABLE LITTLE PILE OF SECRETS! HAVE AT THY!

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The power to object to every point you try to... Moral: OBJECTION!

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Ability to not lose excuses when declining a date.

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The power to ejaculate only when you're greeting someone

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The power to wear your shirt backwards all day.

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The power to poop fast enough to splash your own bum.

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The power to swallow thousand liters of sperm without any ill effects.

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ability to run very fast without stopping forever

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The power to turn your skin into 99% bubble wrap

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The power to shoot socks out of your hands.

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the power to sh*t brix at will!

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The ability to fart inwards.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!