The power to turn wine into water

thumb_up thumb_down +86

The power to light someone's pants on fire by saying: "Lier Lier pants on fire"

thumb_up thumb_down +76

The power to read thoughts but it reads everyones thoughts at the same time and you can't decipher whose thought is whose

thumb_up thumb_down +74

The power to steal other people's pointless superpowers.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

The power that when you think of someone's face your nostrils are filled with the smell of their feet

thumb_up thumb_down +64

The power to run at the speed of light, but are paralyzed from the neck down.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

THe power to whistle from your butthole but any time you do this your penis shrinks

thumb_up thumb_down +36

The power to turn food into shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

The power spite flower

thumb_up thumb_down +34

the power to evenly cook a hot pocket.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

the power to save Chinese people... who needs um?

thumb_up thumb_down +32

the power to think like a sumo wrestler between 2:30 and 3:30 am on thursdays

thumb_up thumb_down +28

ability to run very fast without stopping forever

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Turning into a brick wall. Forever.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

The power to come back to life just by yelling: I LIVE AGAIN! Or RESURRECTION! (which is not easy when you are dead)

thumb_up thumb_down +20

The ability to read minds by absorbing their mental disorders

thumb_up thumb_down +18

The power to kill yourself with your mind.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

The power to wink with both eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +12

The power to turn into a cat while a dog is watching you.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The power of your girlfriend's will

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The power to realize that I am starting to sound (and type) more and more like Salvador Dali, and being proud because the man was a genius, the most fantastic thing he could do every morning, was to wake up with a person as fantastic as himself! And while he indeed walked a different path than most do, no one can deny his footprints are clearer than most... Perfection? A losers wish... to be outstanding... is a gift on its own. Moral: Yeah many of you see this as pointless, so I thought I could just as well add it. While I dream of the age where people stop looking for Gods and strengthen the most powerful tool in the universe: YOU.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

The power to fly, but only when you are less than a foot off the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

The power to fly really fast, but only in one direction (down).

thumb_up thumb_down -12

The power to see through walls, but only when you're in a glass room.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!