The power to pee ants.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The ability to defy death... only when you commit suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The power to think with a 6 year time gap

thumb_up thumb_down +5

the ability to fly through the sky using the skin from your ballsack to glide to the ground

thumb_up thumb_down -5

The power to reseal bottles!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

The ability to blow air out but only after inhaling air The ability to rapidly grow body hair whenever you sneeze The ability to post pointless super powers onto a website The ability to teleport to a dimension where you are about to be eaten during a zombie apocalypse and not be able to come back. The ability to go to prison and not be able to get out.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Th power to be telepathetic

thumb_up thumb_down -29

The ability to open your window, and shout retarded things at your neighbors. "HEY! MY ASH SMELLS LIKE BANANAS!"

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Captain Colorchart - instantly able to choose the right color for any room

thumb_up thumb_down -41

The power to get the most rated pointless superpowers post

thumb_up thumb_down -43

The ability to shrink your penis

thumb_up thumb_down -45

The power to do something for 8 hours and still have to do it the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down -63

The power to make every stop sign I see say "Stop HAMMERTIME"

thumb_up thumb_down -67

the power to get struck by lightning at will.

thumb_up thumb_down -93

the power to read impossibly fast, but only when you're watching a movie with no subtitles

thumb_up thumb_down +150

The power to summon unspendable money

thumb_up thumb_down +134

7|-|3 p0\/\/3r 70 0|\|L'/ b3 4BL3 70 r34D 4|\|D \/\/r173 1|\| L337 $P34|

thumb_up thumb_down +102

The power to turn wine into water

thumb_up thumb_down +96

the power to stop sitting on the internet wacthing cat videos

thumb_up thumb_down +82

the ability to be governor and have an Argentinian mistress

thumb_up thumb_down +80

the power to act exatctly like a pineaplle.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

Be able to hear all the alarmclocks in the world

thumb_up thumb_down +54

The power to bend a bendy straw faster than the speed of light.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

The power to set money on fire

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!