Der pawr tu speek kat langwage

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The power to never sleep and instead go outside and think about your life.

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The power to seduce any woman... that weighs over 300 pounds.

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The power to look super sexy, but only in pitch black darkness.

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The power to tickle your own feet.

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the power to sugar a limpet

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The power to see through the clothes of only the morbidly obese.

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the power to turn people to stone but only if you look in the mirror

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to be able to lift any weight of feathers

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The power to hold your breath forever, but only in a hot-tub.

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The power to issue commands to domesticated house cats. Not the power to make them obey your commands, just the power to issue the commands.

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The power to believe people care about you posting you`re nick, or real name after you`re comment. Posted by Peter Olsen living in Orleands born the 20 of July 1983.

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The power to change the tv channel only when you have the remote in your hands.

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The power to melt ice into hot ice

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The power to type good morals under your comments. Moral: Ever seen me post an actual moral (even less a GOOD one?) Pssh! There is no such thing as good, not that I am aware of at least >:)

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The power to smell your own feet without taking your shoes out.

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The ability to fart inwards.

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The ability to become shit forever.

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The power to turn into a dogbed when somebody says micro-tacos

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The ability to pee as a gas, not a liquid

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The ability to teleport at a random point of the space.

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the power to pee on command

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the power to pee shit and shit piss.

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The power to turn pizza into math worksheets. -Big C

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!