The power to have wood when you wake up.

The ability to have a friend names James who dislikes all your Pointless Superpowers

The power to have your piss turn to solid gold before it exits you.

The power to jump and fly for 1 second.

The power to turn a dollar into three quarters.

The power to lose your hearing and eyesight/

The ability to jizz uncontrollably in your pants randomly during the day

the ability to time travel 5 minutes into the past this power recharges every 5 minutes

The power of hearing peoples conversations but only on topics related to Shrek.

The power to exude spaghetti from your pockets, which is never stopped. The spaghetti keeps coming. Out of your pockets. Spaghetti everywhere.

The power to believe that Mac Donalds burgers look exactly like the pictures that advertise them.

the power to get STD's

The power to lose the remote.

The power to WATCH ME WHIP AND WATCH ME NAE NAE

The AWESOME Power To See With Your Eyes Open

The power to change the shape of any object at will

The power of x-ray vision only when you are naked in public. More people the stronger it is.

A Superpower where only way to fly around is if you are inside a building.

Smell chick peas from over two miles away

The power to speed up wallmart lines; only if your're not in it.

The power to be able to get up 11.5% quicker than the average perosn

The power to walk 1% faster.

The power to type some incredibly perverted "superpowers" and get a boner while laughing so loud the neighbors on both sides of your apartment closed their windows.

To be able to levitate one object in front of you for one second a day

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!