The power to become me. Moral: You could not handle the awesomeness and would ruin yourself just so you can feel "normal" rather than awesome.

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the power to persuade every 80 yo into penetrating you analy

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The power to realize that I am starting to sound (and type) more and more like Salvador Dali, and being proud because the man was a genius, the most fantastic thing he could do every morning, was to wake up with a person as fantastic as himself! And while he indeed walked a different path than most do, no one can deny his footprints are clearer than most... Perfection? A losers wish... to be outstanding... is a gift on its own. Moral: Yeah many of you see this as pointless, so I thought I could just as well add it. While I dream of the age where people stop looking for Gods and strengthen the most powerful tool in the universe: YOU.

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Levitation Power but only 3 inch from ground,

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The power to look beautiful/handsome when nobody is looking at you.

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The power to fart 5 times bigger

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The power to fly upwards at Mach 3 speeds, indoors

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You can read the minds of rocks.

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The power to have a small penis

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The power to control weather on Mars

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The power for shampoo to never go in your eyes, but only when its Johnsons No More Tears.

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The ability to turn into an apple--but not be able to turn back.

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The power to do something when you do it.

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The power to microwave bread

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The power to talk to talking animals.

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The power to give yourself a sinus infection

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the abitity to talk to someone l the way across the world,but only deaf people

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The power to bleed when your grandmother kisses you.

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The power to have every superpower ever (including pointless ones) for one second every full moon, then have every pointless one for the rest of the time.

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The power to do flaming flying kicks by yelling CAPTAIN FEET!

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The power to take away your power.

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The power to make your parents walk into your room whenever you're masturbating.

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The power to charge your iPhone if it is not an iPhone

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The power to read a dictionary in under 48 hours

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!