the power to glow in the light

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The ability to have glow stick bones (glow when broken)

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The power to look into cheese.

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The power to understand math.

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The power to think of hilarious intensely racist jokes, but only at Black Lives Matter protests.

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The ability to dislike on any form of social media, but only if you are looking cross-eyed at your pinky finger while listening to a mashup of Justin Beiber and One Direction.

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The ability to enter a coma but not be able to control for how long

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The ability to go poop and pee.

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The Power to make Anyone's Teeth Clean...

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The power to achieve world peace but only at the expense of your own happiness and the lives of all your friends and family members and everyone will hate you for no reason after doing so.

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The power to have a strong bladder for 5 minutes following urination.

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The power to move and run faster than anything slower than yourself.

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the power to watch reruns of NBC's "Joey" in your head

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The power to induce vomiting after a crazy junk food spree.

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The power to turn Justin Bieber into a Man.

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The power to chuck dead babies from a bridge

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the ability to turn kfc into popeyes

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The ability to find any lost pennies, as long as you're Jewish

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The power to give yourself a sinus infection

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The ability to give yourself brain cancer at will

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The ability to be a jewish, homosexual, black crossdresser in Louisiana.

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The power to blink your eyelids in Morse Code

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To sumon a cheeto named bill every time you say cow.

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The power to have every superpower ever (including pointless ones) for one second every full moon, then have every pointless one for the rest of the time.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!