The power to cough, but only at funerals, and speeches

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The power to die at will

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The power to think of a witty comeback 3 days too late.

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the power to persuade every 80 yo into penetrating you analy

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The Power to glow in the dark during day time only.

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The power to give vegetables immortality.

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The power to see through transparent objects.

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The power to have tacos appear in front of you, only to have them stolen by a black guy.

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The power to fly without leaving the ground.

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The power to turn into Justin beiber whenever you are about to have sex.

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the ability to eject a little steam cloud from your penis every time you finish peeing.

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The power to fly only 5mm above the ground.

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the power to hear a dog whistle

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The ability to turn only your car in the direction in which the president of Zambia is looking.

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The power to fart 5 times bigger

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the power to view the same insurance commercials over and over for years and recite them from memory

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The power to fly to your In-Law's house and ONLY your In-Law's house.

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The superpower to have a superpower

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The power to put out light from your butt

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The power to have no power.

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The ability to turn your semen into spiders.

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The ability to get aids and stay a virgin.

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The power to guess correctly how many bags you'll need for groceries.

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The power to make Justin Beiber come out of the closet.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!