The power to control an army of termites to eat any wooden object, as long as the object is from IKEA

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The power to instantly ressurect at the very same spot if you get submerged under lava or acid.

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The power to levitate mustard.

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The power to know what you do when you discuss the secret formula on the third Wednesday in January and it's not raining outside after we've gargled with vanilla pudding.

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The power to turn your external hearing off, only to replace it with the sound of very, very slow internal dubstep.

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The power of attracting lightning to your body, but not being imune to it.

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[insert pointless super powers here]

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the power get massive erections but you are only aroused buy new born babies or near death old men and women.

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the ability to make real zero dollar bills

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The ability to consume nutrient of the object what you swallow.

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The power to smell like poop once every hour.

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The power to die just by trying to use the word l...

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the power to permanently change your name to Graham

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the power to fly if you are touching the ground

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The power to be away from the Internet without getting bored.

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The power to find treasure, when you try to look for it.

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The power to know what Willis is talking about.

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The power to run as fast as a cheetah! Moral: A dead cheetah...

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the power to know when it isn't either 4 or 9 o'clock.

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The power to make a watch that functions as a small phone and is named after a fruit. I would call it Applewatch.

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The power to live through torture.

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The power to explode the entire world every time you became happy.

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The power to have a strong bladder for 5 minutes following urination.

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The power to have a normal sized torso, but short legs.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!