The power to piss your pants each time you feel threatened.

The ability to add any two numbers and get 5

the power to give any goatAIDS using your penis

the distinct ability to tell when a marine plant is mildly displeased with it's cells.

The power to smile uncontrollably.

The ability to sit down without using any other body part than your butt.

To be be able to be and throw fire without being fireproof.

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The power to shit in your eye

The Power to bite your own ear.

The power to time travel 1 second at a time

the power to be powerless

The power to instantly determine when someone is a dumbass.

The power to download anything you want to 99 percent complete.

The ability to fly as high and as far as you want for 5 minutes, but you will always forget the time limit, and fall to the ground.

Hat seduction. 'Nuff said.

The power to make every stop sign I see say "Stop HAMMERTIME"

the power to fall asleep while being awake

The power to light little sticks on fire by rubbing them quickly on the box they came in.

The Ability To Stop Existing Only When You Already Don't Exist

The power to taste anything you smell.

The power to sleep with your eyes open but you still can't see what's going on

The power to drive better when you're drunk yet run into furniture once you get home.

The ability to be jokingly racist and not get sued by an hypocritically racist black man and end up having to carry out a minor jail sentence or pay a fine.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!