The power to have the longest little finger

The power to be really bad at math.

The power to burst into flames but not be immune to heat.

the power that makes your ass turn into a shit machine gun, but you can only use it if its directed at your mouth.

The ability to kick in a three point shot but only during a game.

the ability to touch type but only when you have no hands

The power to shovel well. To shovel very well.

the power to quickly re-wrap christmas presents

Any telePATHETIC power you may get.

The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

The power to have YMCA or "In the navy" play explosively loudly from your nostrils and be immune to it yourself. Moral: WE KNOW YOU ARE H0MOSEXUAL ALREADY! TURN THAT SHIT OFF!

The power to turn your external hearing off, only to replace it with the sound of very, very slow internal dubstep.

The power to believe you are being hilarious... get it? Eh? ;) ;) Ahahaha XD Yeah, thats funny eh? Yeah I know, how does he do that xD, I wish I knew hahaha HOHOHO! I should be a comedian!

The ability to turn door knobs with your feet every other even day.

The power to cure cancer, in people already dead.

the ability to make real zero dollar bills

The power to smell like poop once every hour.

Power to know EVERYTHING you say tha just happened

the ability to turn into the body of a car. Just the body, no engine, no wheels, nothin, just the body

The power to know what Willis is talking about.

The power to poke

The ability to go poop and pee.

The power to explode the entire world every time you became happy.

The power to have a strong bladder for 5 minutes following urination.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!