the power to believe there are 50 shades of grey

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The power to see through clothes of women 70+.

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The power to change to a wombat when you have an erection while you're sleeping.

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The power to switch your left pinky toe with your right big toe and vice versa.

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The ability to pick ur nose while killing a bacteria and kissing a mouse ass

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The power to turn all of the air into a solid.

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The power to die

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The power to have sex with anyone, but only if they are older than 65

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The power to read the minds of hobos. ( now you know what hobos think about you )

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*The power to fall, but only when you trip.

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The power to be happy whenever you want, but only at funerals

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The ability to give yourself any super power, but you cannot use it if it is used.

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Black power

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The power to always smell like cheep wine.

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The power to swallow thousand liters of sperm without any ill effects.

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To have your speed, strength, reflexes and senses heightened to the level of whatever is appropriate in your situation.

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The power to poop fast enough to splash your own bum.

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The ability of telepathy but only when your targets are toast pieces, not whole toast mind you, toast pieces. This includes crumbs

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The power to tell time every other second. sometimes.

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The ability to be a successful troll.

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The power to make vegetables horny.

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The power to make a sound in the forest when nobody is around

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You can send your mind and memories into your past self, but it doesn't work if you have any regrets or want to do things better.

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the power to eat out your but and poop out your mouth

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!