The ability to summon a lamp once.

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The power to teleport. But you can only teleport to the top of Mt. Everest and you cant teleport back.

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The power to sleep

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The power to lick your own back...

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The power to do NOTHING!

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The power to cheat death, but only when your alive...

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the power to do something amazing, when no one's looking.

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the ability to take a fart that other people can actually see.

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the power to talk to fish but not people

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The power to be a dog, with Herpes, that smells like farts.

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the power to make stupid useless puns and not pay attention to the villian

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The power to convert oxygen to carbon dioxide

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The power to come back to life just by yelling: I LIVE AGAIN! Or RESURRECTION! (which is not easy when you are dead)

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the ability to turn on lamps but you have to be touching them

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The power to create a real-life version of any video game character, but an equally capable evil version is also created and they can pay attention to nothing except battling endlessly with neither gaining the upper hand.

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The ability to have every pointless superpower then, now, and in the future.

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The power of your girlfriend's will

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The power to do nothing

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The power to automaticaly eat yourself when you get hungry

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The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

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The power that, eveything you touch turns into whatever it already was

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the power make the left half of your body invisible.

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The power to dive through an ocean without having to breathe, but only if the ocean is made of vomit.

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The power of flight, but also have vertigo. VertigoMan to the resc Aggh!!!! Please someone get me down. OH GOD!!!! HELP!!!!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!