The power to suck deez nuts

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The ability to fly only as fast as you can walk.

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The power to cough, but only at funerals, and speeches

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The power to travel faster than the speed of light but never slower than the speed of light.

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The power to sleep for one thousand years

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the ability to turn on lamps but you have to be touching them

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The power to walk after about 6 months of age.

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The power to move objects by touching them.

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The power to be born again

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The power to know what you do when you discuss the secret formula on the third Wednesday in January and it's not raining outside after we've gargled with vanilla pudding.

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The Power Above This Power During Night time. The Power Below This Power During the day. Invulnerable for one second during dawn and dusk.

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The power to re-click a webpage over and over as long as it won't load

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The power to repeat everything you say twice. The power to repeat everything you say twice.

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The power to write about power.

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(PS: Neo was the seventh Jesus, we live in the matrix)

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The power to be a bird that can't fly

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The power to make any can of soda react as though it has been dropped down a flight of stairs when you open it.

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the power to know when it isn't either 4 or 9 o'clock.

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the power of the Anti-petter gun, which fires bullshit over the moon.

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The power to make a watch that functions as a small phone and is named after a fruit. I would call it Applewatch.

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The ability to turn traffic lights red in your lane and green for everyone else

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The power to shoot pencils out of your mouth every 10 seconds

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The power to glitter in the sunlight. Especially if you're a guy.

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the super power of being a housewife..

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!