The power to sleep but only when its past midnight

thumb_up thumb_down +59

The ability to know what time it is, but only when you have a watch on.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

the power to do CALCULUS for homeless people you run into on the street.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

The power to control hummingbirds.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

The power to charge your iPhone if it is not an iPhone

thumb_up thumb_down +51

The ability to feel pain 1,000 times more acutely than an average human.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

The ability to breath fire through your mouth but only when your mouth is closed.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

power to breathe

thumb_up thumb_down +43

the power to talk to fish but not people

thumb_up thumb_down +41

The power to fail hard at the catchphra (or whatever its called) simply because you keep answering garbage when it asks "what is the jummiest!" Moral: I work out hard dammit! I want muscles of steel! And Bananasplit contains banana (duh) which just binds fat and makes me look like a bodybuilder... (yes I did look like that and would eat garbage rather than banana, I mean most "family restaurant" foo out there is garbage) "Family restaurant" guide, because moral man loves you: Mc Donalds, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Burger King, and I really need fats and proteins to work out as hard as I do... I mean I am running on a uh.. stand still training bicycle thingie... too tired to look it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

The power to shoot string cheese out of your fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

The ability to catch any ilness you want.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Being able to shapeshift into a grandpa then not being able to turn back until next year

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Reverse Pooping

thumb_up thumb_down +27

The power to hold the floor down using gravity.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

The power to pee ants.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

the ability to find pointless superpower

thumb_up thumb_down +19

The power to fight your way out of a wet paper bag.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

The ability to never have to take a shit again

thumb_up thumb_down +13

The power to control Rollie pollies

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Invisibility when people aren't looking.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

The ability to make your handwriting invisible when nobody is reading it

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The power too be a professonal hacker but a kid could delete it.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

the power to make youtube videos buffer twice as fast on your iPhone.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!