the power of cosmic pimping with a space suit on!

The power to return to life but only after being ritually buried 6ft underground

The power to laugh at Tyler Perry's House of Payne

The power of Superuselessnessman

the power to time travel 1sec to the past every 1 day

the power to think up AWSOME funny pointless powers but never have the guts to put them on Pointless Superpowers

The Ability to breathe but only when your dead

The ability to see through glass.

the power to turn everything you touch into poop.

The power to have car insurance, but only when you don't have a car.

The power to predict the past

The power to flip people off with your middle toes.

The power to taste the colors of M&M's.

the power to make body fat go away

The power to deliver gifts around the world in one night but be fatter than hell, live in a frozen wasteland, and only little kids think you exist

the power to dodge cars only when they are parked

The power to only be able to prepare foods that require a toaster in a bathtub.

The power to move an object 0.01mm away from you.

The power to know the perfect rebuttal, but only after you've lost and nobody cares about what you were arguing about anymore.

The power to be Emperor of farmville but only in a full eclipse

the ability to eat through your ass and shit out your mouth

The power to turn water into gastrointestinal fluids.

The ability to scratch your balls telepathically.

The power to hear yourself on recording and not think you sound weird

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!