The power to psychically flush any toilet in the world once every 27 minutes.

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The power of bad luck

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The power to open any door with no lock on it.

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the power to transform into Kanye West

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The power to ejaculate napalm

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The ability to transform yourself into a Turkey but only with a brain larger than the head of a turkey. Note: People will become happy if they eat you for christmas.

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THE SUPER FRIENDS HEROES LEAGUE OF SUPER HEROES OF LESSER USEFUL HEROES! KNIGHT FARTSALOT!: Fear my methane! You and me in one small room for 3 days and you will faint for sure! Uncle Diabeetush: Save their parents Captain! Ill take care of their children! Captain Novolin: I have great sugar level control! Help me! Evil Mistress Sugarpie is too sweet! Runald MagnifiCient Donalds: HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR WOOOOO! I keep American people from starvation! Remember kids less than 250 pounds counts as starvation! And their LEADER... MORAL MAN!: The hell am I introducing myself here for? Damn you Subconscious! How can you expect people to understand my genius of putting myself here! They are morons! Oh... hi everybody.. wazzup?

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The power to see why kids love cinnamon toast crunch

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The power to wear shirts considerably more often than others.

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The power to take huge shits at will.

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The power to re grow hair as soon as it gets cut off.

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The power to have incredible upper-body strength, but not have arms or legs.

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The power to become encased in concrete at will.

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The power to become a laptop forever!

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The power to turn on a hot flash, but only when it's 80 degrees out.

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time travel that ownly have 5 time before loose it

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The power to automatically blink rapidly at the rate of 1,588 times per second everytime you open your mouth.

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The power to ejaculate laser beams.

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The power to be normal and average

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The power to moves in slow motion.

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to be able to eat candybars and spit out diabetes

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Ability to be Stephen Hawking's stunt double.

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the power to to deep fry anything deep fried

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the ability to solve paradoxes

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!