- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to complete the jigsaw puzzle that you got bored of because it was to hard and now its in the box and covered in dust

the power to never be late to work, but only when you're unemployed.

The ability to lift small objects with your mind, but only if you are touching them.

A power to turn into an ant, but only one Time.

you can summon raccoons, but all they do is piss on your shit

To be able to cut paper by doing the scissor action with your fingers.

the power of anything you do makes you high and drunk

to be one second faster than 5mph in any 80's arcade game using one finger to push the buttons

The power to transform into a bucket of water.

The power to have all pointless superpowers, but only on the 12th and or 13th on january on a year that isn't 2015 or lower, but you have to be wearing nothing but purple underwear and a skanky hat.

the power to walk on land.

The ability to turn into a melting crayon for $20

the power to burn your school down from napalm farts.

The power to think of a good super power right now.

The power to keep up with the kardashians

The power to poop in the worst time ever and you cannot control it

The ability to live forever but age quicker.

The power to lick your balls.

The power to not remember, the only problem, is that you don't remember having this awesome power.

The power to talk to plants but only when they have mean things to say.

The power to have perfect vision, but only in pitch black darkness

The power to heal but every time you heal your leg or arm falls off.

The power to magically generate drugs in your pockets, but only while being arrested or in a police station.

The power to speak a language only you can undeerstand

Pointless Super Powers