the power to die on the spot

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The power to shut me the F UCK UP! Moral: Ironically I have not said a single word for hours... so that would be impossible... Now, if you hear MY voice when you read this, then you are either psychic or psychotic, which is not that different if you ask me... Now.. if you hear YOUR voice inside your head, then YOU SHUT THE FRUCK UP AND GET LOST! :D :D :D :D :D :D (A MoralMan Original, now this one was pretty cool)

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The power to fly at the speed of light, but then your pants keep coming off!

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the power to say everything in Comic Sans font.

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the power to see 3 seconds into the past.

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The power to make everything except yourself invisible.

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The power to not be killed by anything that can't kill you.

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The power to occasionally mistake your hand for a bear.

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The power to cook 3 minute noodles in under 1 minute.

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The power to Punch holes in Mountains, Only Mountains and nothing else.

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The power to psychically flush any toilet in the world once every 27 minutes.

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The power of having the highest rated comment

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The power to summon garden mushrooms in the top of your head every time you're having a serious talk to anyone

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The power of bad luck

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The ability to be completely bullet-proof as long as a bullet never hits you.

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The power to ejaculate napalm

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To get to know everything Jack Nicholson has said yet you blurb out his comments and random and by the time you face this YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: You think this entry was boring? It is great actually, what? You say it sucks? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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The power to piss your pants whenever you want.

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The power to wear shirts considerably more often than others.

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the power to turn wine into water.

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The power to sleep with your eyes open.

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The power to fly really fast, but only in one direction (down).

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The power to become a laptop forever!

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The power to become encased in concrete at will.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!