the power to defecate while standing up...

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The power to die after life has left you old and decrepit.

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the power to be immortal, but only temporally

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The power to magically generate drugs in your pockets, but only while being arrested or in a police station.

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The power to see through glass

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the power to fire my lazer

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the power to photobomb random peoples photos without even knowing

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the power to be friends with Donald trump

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The power to spit venom, but it misses 99.9% of the time.

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The power to be invisible to everything but security cameras.

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The power to turn invisible except for your fingers and toes.

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the power to turn into a tree

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the ability to spin gold into straw

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The power to ejaculate out of your ears once daily

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The power to summon a green Hippo that would mush up your poop in your toilet. Oddly, the superpower is only able to be summonded one a year, sorry.

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The power to move in slow motion whenever running away from danger. Moral: Hilarious! XD

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The power to take my legs off the floor while in a sitting position.

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The power to be able to stop the world for two seconds only every 2 years.

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The ability to play black ops anytime you want

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The power to make everything except yourself invisible.

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The power to change your eye color.

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The power to not be killed by anything that can't kill you.

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the ability to turn things purple by touching it.

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The power to actually ENJOY Dora the Explorer.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!