The power to cook 3 minute noodles in under 1 minute.

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The power to actually ENJOY Dora the Explorer.

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The power to psychically flush any toilet in the world once every 27 minutes.

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The power to believe that Mac Donalds burgers look exactly like the pictures that advertise them.

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The power to worsen your own eyesight at will.

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the power uncontrollably explode expensive cars

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Read fortune cookies without opening them

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The ability to be poor for life

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THE SUPER FRIENDS HEROES LEAGUE OF SUPER HEROES OF LESSER USEFUL HEROES! KNIGHT FARTSALOT!: Fear my methane! You and me in one small room for 3 days and you will faint for sure! Uncle Diabeetush: Save their parents Captain! Ill take care of their children! Captain Novolin: I have great sugar level control! Help me! Evil Mistress Sugarpie is too sweet! Runald MagnifiCient Donalds: HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR WOOOOO! I keep American people from starvation! Remember kids less than 250 pounds counts as starvation! And their LEADER... MORAL MAN!: The hell am I introducing myself here for? Damn you Subconscious! How can you expect people to understand my genius of putting myself here! They are morons! Oh... hi everybody.. wazzup?

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the power to know how your going to die right before you die.`

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The power to see why kids love cinnamon toast crunch

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The power to take huge shits at will.

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The ability to discharge a battery - JW

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The pointless superpower to miss moral man. He was a dick.

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The ability to straighten pictures on a wall with your mind.

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The power to know what weather its gonna be like in 1 minute... in South Korea

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The power to ejaculate laser beams.

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the power to hovertate

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Ability to be Stephen Hawking's stunt double.

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The power to communicate with dust bunnies.

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The power to become invisible, but it only works when you are using it for noble and moral purposes.

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The power to suck your own dick, by growing and shrinking your p3nis.

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the power of the succulent game

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The power to regulate your body temperature at about 98 degrees at all times.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!