The ability to irreversibly turn into a turkey days before thanksgiving.

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Be able to create fire with your hands but you are not invisible to it

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The power to find any film directed by Uwe Boll entertaining.

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The power to swallow thousand liters of sperm without any ill effects.

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the power to guess anybodies breakfast

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the power to turn into a rock and you cant turn back into a human

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To be able to summon old people

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The ability to perfectly recall the and only the third digit in a series of numbers.

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The power to balance the light switch in the middle but only on the 4th try.

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The power to turn oxygen into carbon dioxide.

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The power to make coma patients bark.

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The power to grow your nose hair out to one hundred times its normal length.

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The power to hear what is happening to objects (such as a bed).

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The power to both love and hate marmite.

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the power to convert oxygen and glucose to water and carbon dioxide every time you breathe.

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The power to freeze laptops when you're watching porn and someone comes in.

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The power to be reading this when you can WORSHIP ME! Moral: You love me, I love me, we all win! Now, bring forth thy sacrifices, women, gold, diamonds, women, more women, yeah... And if you are a woman, you can come many many times with me...

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the power to get wider by eating junk food

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The power to know what you do when you discuss the secret formula on the third Wednesday in January and it's not raining outside after we've gargled with vanilla pudding.

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The pointless superpower to point any where and one of those bouncy castles appear.

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the most bunka busting mega ultra super duper large biggest most powerfull cool best ever strongest mightiest power in whe whole universe but dont knowing what it is.

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The power to turn into an exploding pink chair.

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The power to survive jumping form a plane as long as you have a parachute.

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The power to compare anything to pr0n because "you know it when you see it."

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!